They Ain’t Heavy

It has come to my attention that members of a certain political party (which shall remainnameless) have decided it is time to modify our society by removing all gender specific nouns and pronouns from the English language and to replace them with generic gender-neutral words.  For example, one would no longer refer to their Mother or Father by that specific title but would, instead, refer to them as “parent”.  Also, one would not refer to their brother or sister by those names but would use the generic term of sibling.

A member of that same unnamed political party recently concluded a prayer in a official setting with the closing phrase “amen and awomen”.    This, of course, makes no sense as there is no such word as “awomen” and is pandering at the very least.  The true meaning of the word amen has an interesting etymology but does not have anything to do with the male gender.  But then, this is an elected official and to my knowledge one has no educational requirements before throwing one’s hat into the ring.  I don’t even think a hat is required.

Should these unnamed and apparently uneducated politicians get their way, we will need to rewrite pop culture, like how we have been rewriting history, to make the world a better place.  For example, the Hollies will have to remake “He ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother” to “They Ain’t Heavy, They’re My Siblin”.  George Clooney will need to remake his movie, now entitled “Oh Sibling, Where Art Thou”, and so on.  Additionally, we will no longer celebrate Mother’s Day and Father’s Day separately but will have to combine them into one day known as Parent’ Day”.  I really am not sure how we are to deal with the clergy and religious as we no longer address a priest as Father or a nun as Sister.  Will a Mother Superior now be known as HNWIC (head nun what’s in charge)?

The lexicographer will be quite busy adding new words to the dictionary, such as womention, womentor, womemory, and womenstruation (maybe it should have been that all along).  The new words being added will have room to be included as they will also be busy removing all the gender specific nouns and pronouns.  A synonym for insane is mentally ill.  It is quite apparent to me that anyone who would support this lunacy is quite obviously womentally ill.


Those are my thoughts, what are yours?


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Tom Lind

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